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Therapy with an Emotionally Avoidant Partner

You are at your wit’s end, trying to get your partner to understand your emotions and experience. Always begging to be heard and validated leaves you feeling defeated. You can appreciate your partner’s practical nature, but sometimes you need them to show up for you emotionally. You desperately need them to understand the impact of their words and actions. Trying to make headway has felt like trying to reason with a brick wall. You don’t want to leave, but you know that you can’t keep enduring this.

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Signs that Your Partner May be Emotionally Avoidant

  • They rarely express emotions outside of anger.

  • They struggle to respond to your emotions and the emotions of others.

  • They often avoid conflict or shutdown in conflict once it has begun.

  • They struggle with vulnerability.

  • They prefer to keep conversations light, happy or conversational.

  • They appear to ignore anything with “too much” emotion or conflict.

Reminders About Your Emotionally Avoidant Partner

  • They can be avoidant and still love you very much.

  • They can be avoidant and still want to make your relationship work.

  • Their emotional avoidance is often due to how they were socialized and/or internalized beliefs they have about emotions and safety.

  • They still have emotions and feelings. They just might not share them. Continue to be gentle with them.

  • Their emotional avoidance could be situational. Consider their current circumstances.

How Empowered Therapy, Colorado Can Help

It can be soooo frustrating trying to get through to a partner that is emotionally avoidant. Empowered Therapy can help you and your partner learn to relate to one another in a more emotionally aware way.  I’ve helped partner’s who struggle identifying and expressing emotion, get in touch with their emotions and share them with their partner. You and your partner will also become more aware of the impact of your actions on your partner. Understanding your unique partner dynamic and the impact on your overall relationship is an essential part of the work you will be doing. 


We will start by diving into your past and present strengths, events and areas for growth. I will email a Gottman Connect Assessment that will give me an idea of the hot spots in the relationship early on in our work together.  Gottman Method is a great modality for those experiencing emotionally avoidance in their relationship, because the tips are practical, easy and accessible with the different pdfs, step-by-step tools and depictions that make the work more approachable. You will also have the opportunity to revisit past hurts in a healing way if it feels that past issues have not been resolved. Throughout our time together we will be looking at what happens and why it happens, so you can become great at resolving issues in and out of session. 

For a more detailed breakdown of what your couples sessions will look like, click the button below and scroll to the What to Expect in Session section.

Whether you are ready to start working with me in Arvada Colorado or you still have some questions, I encourage you to reach out via phone or email using the buttons below. 

Feeling like you don’t have the time to go to couples therapy? Online therapy is one of a number of specialities at Empowered Therapy. Click on the buttons below to check out the specialities that interest you!

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